Cardinal sin

I think the cardinal sin of blogging is to go more than a week without adding a new post.  So because of my 3 week hiatus there is probably no one reading my blog anymore.  That is actually a somewhat comforting thought. 🙂  Anyway, here’s the latest scoop with me:

Oliver

Oliver just had his 3 month birthday on Saturday.  I think he looks more like a weiner dog than a cocker spaniel.  His body is getting really long and skinny!  When I first got him, he reminded me of a baby seal.  Because he was all squeaky all the time, and he had a soft, ‘lil pear shaped body.  Now he reminds me of a bear cub because anything that goes in front of his face, he opens his mouth wide and wants to put his teeth into it!  The potty training is still going strong, but we’re not there yet.  He LOVES to chew his toys and my shoes.  He’s doing great walking on a leash.  His favorite treat is baby food.  He will do ANYTHING for a lick of that stuff!  Even the peas!  And I happen to think he is the genius of his puppy kindergarten class.  (Although that has not been confirmed by the teacher or anything.) 🙂  Anyway, he is a complete joy.

Coaching

I’ve started coaching my girls volleyball team.  I am coaching the 15 & Under team for the Valley Tiger Volleyball Club.  We had our first practice last Thursday, and it was so much fun!  It seriously brought me back to my college days.  The girls have so much talent, they want to work so hard and more importantly, they just love the game.  I’m excited to teach the girls what I know about volleyball, but I am even more excited for what I will learn from them.  Our first tournament is January 10th!

Running

Basically not doing it lately.  I did do the Living History Farms run with Scott and Lindsay that I play volleyball with and Pete’s sister, Aubrey, and her husband.  That was a ton of fun.  But I haven’t run since.  I had the flu the weekend before last, and last weekend I had a sore throat and some of the achiness that goes along with it so I haven’t really had the energy.  We’ll see if I can get back on the bandwagon in December still.  It may have to be more of a New Years Resolution.  Of course, Pete is still out running his 10 miles every Saturday morning and making me feel like a complete slacker.

A Talk

Speaking of Pete, we had “a talk” about a month ago.  The subject of which has a causal association with my lack of desire to blog.  Anyway, I’ve decided I hate big relationship-talks with boyfriends.  You think they are supposed to make the two people feel better because you are openly communicating, but instead you just say or hear a bunch of things that you will never forget (but wish you could).  No more living in a fantasy world where relationships are easy and progress naturally.  Reality has hit.  And as usual, it’s never as good as you’d imagined.

Holidays

I’m trying to get in the holiday spirit, but I’m just not there yet.  Thanksgiving with the family was a nice start, but I sort of got derailed in my celebrating because I got the flu right after, and now I seem to have a cold.  I think last week I was too busy with volleyball and coaching and Oliver’s training to even start thinking about Christmas.  I have put some Christmas CDs in my car to try to nudge me along.  Saturday, I went to Holiday Tea at the Flynn Mansion with the DCGs for our December gathering, and we had our gift exchange.  So that did help get me in the mood.  I have two Christmas parties this weekend (the Drunken Turkey Day at a friend of Pete’s and then Chaunnakah Fest at Dave’s.  Lynds, I’m going to miss you at Dave’s this year!  Do you have any good ideas for the gift exchange for me?)  After these festivities, I will have no excuse not to be in the Christmas spirit!  Or maybe I just need to eat some Christmas cookies?!?!?

I’m most excited for….

In just a little over a week from today, Lyndsay and David are coming back from Sweden for two whole weeks!  This is definitely the highlight of the month for me.  We are planning a night out on Friday, December 26th for any of you who will be around so stay tuned….

It’s been awhile…

Well I think it’s been over a week since I’ve blogged which is a big no-no in blogging.  They say people should do a minimum of three posts a week if you’re keeping a blog.  I think I have some pretty good excuses though, and since I know that it’s only my dear friends that read this thing, I know you’ll understand.  Here’s what I’ve been up to:

New Puppy  Well I finally took the plunge.  Last Friday, my dad and I roadtripped to Minneapolis to pick up my new baby.  His name is Oliver Hannan, he’s 9 weeks old today, and he’s the sweetest little cocker spaniel boy you’ve ever seen in your life.  He is doing great at home and keeping me busy with potty training, baths, and just lots of playtime!  Although he spends the day in his kennel (he’s not a fan yet), he’s already sleeping in bed with me at night and no nighttime accidents so far!  Next Wednesday we start Puppy Life Class through Canine Craze in Urbandale which I’m really looking forward to.  Also, he’s already made a friend in the neighborhood.  My neighbor Dana just got a Border Collie, Geronimo, who’s also 9 weeks old.  (Their 16 year old Golden Retriever passed away about the same time as Bernice.)  Anyway, Ollie and Geronimo met last night, and they had a great time playing together!  Geronimo is a lot bigger, so Oliver would stand on his hind legs and box him in the face.  It was the cutest thing ever!  Here’s some pics of my little boy.

Oliver & Lexi

Oliver & Lizzie

Ollie & Pete

Now can you understand why I haven’t been blogging?  Who could resist that sweet little face?

Running  Still hasn’t happened since the marathon.  It’s been 3 1/2 weeks since I’ve ran.  I have to admit the motivation has been lacking some (or totally).  I want to continue running though, I just don’t want to go by myself.  I need it to be a more fun, social sort of thing (if any of you are interested!)  So, anyway, tomorrow morning I’m meeting a group of 5 girls at 5:15 am (yes, I know I’m insane) to run with.  Missy, you’ll get a kick out of this…it’s Erin Symonaitis’ and her running group.  I’ve run into her at all the races this year, and she always runs with a group so I asked if I could join them.    I also join Erin’s running club, The Cranky Gnomes, to do my long runs on Saturdays with.  Here’s their website:  http://crankygnomeathleticclub.com/  Anyway, I’m signed up do do Living History Farms next Saturday with Pete’s sister, Aubrey, and Lindsay that I play volleyball with so I figure I better get a couple of runs in the next week!  Wish me luck on the early morning run tomorrow – or really just waking up at 4:30 in the morning!

That’s all I have time for, for now.  But I thought I’d leave you with this really great quote I read yesterday:

Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it.”
William Feather 1889-1981, Writer

A makeover

I don’t know what it is about this time of year, but when the weather turns cold and the days get shorter, it triggers something inside me…something that says “Ugh, I look disgusting!”  For me, there are several contributing factors.  The first problem is, the summer tan is now gone.  I’ve gone from a nice healthy (and slimming, I might add!) shade of golden brown, to a ruddy, blotchy, almost transparent white.  If this didn’t happen to me every year (since I met my sunworshiping friends – Alli, Jenny and Michelle), I would think it would be impossible for one person to be so fair-skinned, yet get so dark in the summertime.  Btw, I know this is HORRIBLE for my skin, which is why I’ve vowed once again, NOT to visit the tanning beds this winter.  The second problem is, I’ve basically stopped working out in the two weeks since the marathon.  Unfortunately, I haven’t stopped eating, so I’m basically getting more obese by each passing second.  The third problem is, I have adult acne.  Period.  I can’t think of anything else to say on this, except I’ve tried (almost!) everything and nothing helps.  (Mandy, I know I need to stop picking.)  Also, I HATE my fall wardrobe, it is old and raggedy looking.  I need lots of new clothes but can’t find anything that isn’t made for anorexic teenagers or for grandmas.

Anyway, last year around this time, I did a more permanent makeover.  But this year, I’m looking for a less surgical (and expensive) route. 🙂  So, yesterday, I filled out this skin evaluation online, and ordered a new and customized skin care regimen at skinID.com.  (I’m sure you’ve seen the commercials – that’s how I got sucked in!)  The skinID line is by Neutrogena which every dermatologist I’ve ever seen has always been very complimentary of that brand.  So, after my evaluation, I discovered I’m a 14-32-72, which are basically the numbers of the cleanser, acne treatment and hydrator that they recommend for my specific complexion and related issues.  I found this $10 rebate online and I get a free travel bag – total cost $36.85.  So, yeah, I got sucked in.  I’m trying to be positive and think that this will be the answer to my prayers (using the Secret), but of course, after have acne since the age of 12, I’m skeptical.  I’ll keep ya’ll posted.

The second thing I’ve been doing for a while is browsing magazines and looking online for a new haircut.  I haven’t had a new cut in quite a while, and you know how boring that can get.  So, I found a cut in this month’s Shape magazine that I LUV.  It’s long (like my hair now), but it has some layers and thick sideswept bangs.  Now, I have an appointment with Ben, my stylist, to do it on Saturday!  I’m really excited.  It’s so fun getting a new haircut.  Anyhoo, I tried to scan the picture in to post for you guys last night, but my scanner wasn’t functioning (maybe bad scanner karma from scanning Pete’s note).  Anyway, I found some pics online that are similar to the look I’m going for in case you’re curious:

Ok, you get the idea.  Hope it will be a nice change!  Ok, well I have to sign out now and go park it in front of the tv.  I’ll be watching election results all night so feel free to call me to celebrate (or to commiserate).

Vote!!!

My dear friend, Chris, just sent me the following email.  I know it is probably considered cheating to post another person’s writing on your blog, but I really couldn’t say it any better.  Chris, thank you for inspiring all of us and holding us all accountable to be educated and active in the political process! 

“Without giving you any pressure about WHO to vote for, I just want to make sure I send out the message to all my friends and family about how important it is for you to exercise your right to VOTE!! Today is the day and we are undoubtedly at a point in history that will be retold to our children and grandchildren as they study the history of this great country. How lucky are we? It’s seriously exciting to think about the opportunity we have TODAY!

Anyway, I know most of you either already did or are planning on it already, but just wanted to make sure I caught the few and far between stragglers that might be out there. No excuses… get out and vote. Here’s a link to information about voting in Iowa if you need it — even if you’re not registered at your current address yet, you CAN vote today!

http://www.vote411.org/bystateresult.php

You know I’ll be watching the votes come in tonight. Hope you will be too — this is important stuff!

Take care and have a fantastic ELECTION DAY!!! Send the message on to your friends and family too — an easy thing you can do to be involved in the political process!!!

Love ya!
Chris

Blogs and boyfriends

TGIF!  It’s been a week of ups and downs.  Let me start with the “down.”  I got a phone call from Pete on Tuesday night, and after a little friendly chatter he dropped a bomb.  He said, “I read your blog yesterday.”  Immediately I’m freaking out thinking, “ohhhhh shit” but I’m praying that he’s cool with it.  So, in my most calm and no big deal type voice I said, “Oh?  What’d you think?”  And he followed that up with, “I was a little hurt and upset.”  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.  (Sorry for the profanity, but I’m trying to relay exactly what was going through my mind in the moment.)  I tried to explain that I only sent my blog address out to like my 10 dearest friends (TRUE) so it wasn’t like I was spouting the most intimate details of our relationship to the entire world, and he responded with, “Yeah, but you know how I came across it?  I clicked the link to your blog from Lyndsay’s blog.  So pretty much everyone who’s reading Lyndsay’s blog (much wider distribution than mine) has probably your blog.”  Oh snap.  (Which also helps explain why I had 60 some hits on one day.  Oops!)  I spend the rest of the conversation begging his forgiveness and reiterating how much I care about him and that I would never intentionally hurt him, etc.  I’m not going to go into the details of the ENTIRE conversation because I am working on respecting his (and our) privacy.  But the main points that came out of the conversation were:

• Pete hates my blog.  Well, maybe hates is a strong word (but I like strong words!), but he really didn’t like anything he read.  In fact, he said he just stopped reading it finally because he was just getting upset and felt like he shouldn’t be reading it because some of the things were things I hadn’t even told him.  True.
• Me feeling f-ing HORRIBLE.  Seriously, he is the by far the most thoughtful guy I have ever been with, and I reward that by publicly humiliating him.  (Not intentionally AT ALL, but I probably could have guessed he wouldn’t like some – or really all – of the things I wrote about him just because he is such a private person.)
• Pete expressing his feelings.  I was v. happy about this even though all the feelings were pretty much bad news for me. 😦
• Me realizing for the millionth time that I am SUPER open, and Pete is SUPER private.  So we have to compromise on things.  I’m going to take a little more of an editing eye to my blog.  Just a little though because I still have to be me.  And I promised not to put up any more notes that he writes or anything like that that really should remain between us.  (I feel like a shitbag about that marathon note now.)
• Pete is not going to read my blog anymore.  I felt really bad about this for a couple of days, actually.  It bums me out that something I enjoy is something that can upset him.  But he had a very good point, he said, “Well the name of it IS girl talk diary.  It’s not really for guys.”  And with that he pretty much hit the nail on the head.  He’s very insightful.

Now for the “up.”  Last night we went to a little party at Erin (Pete’s ex) and her husband Matt’s house.  And, it was super fun!  I really had a great time.  It was the first time I’ve ever got to talk to Erin for more than a minute, and she was really cool.  Cool, in the way that we would totally all be friends with her.  She’s a really laid-back, friendly, low-maintenance type of girl.  (And REALLY pretty.  I know you were all wondering!)  Also, she and Matt are big wine lovers and wonderful hosts, so of course, they won me over easily by keeping my glass full. 🙂  Anyway, we had great conversation and lots of laughs, and now I can honestly say I’m over the whole ex-girlfriend jealousy.

Now, there’s one thing I need to vent about.  My friend Amy Jo went on a date with this guy last night.  He had seen her out, thought she was cute, and then they started talking on Facebook.  So last night was their first date.  One of the questions he asked her was, “So why are you single?  What’s wrong with you?”  Now, is it just me, or is that the most idiotic question ever?  (Part of the problem might be that I know this guy, and he thinks he’s God’s gift to women or something.)  But seriously, how can one single person ask that question of another?  And, since WHEN does being single mean there is something wrong with you?  That just irritates the hell out of me.  Maybe we’re single because we’re selective.  Maybe we’re single because we’ve been heartbroken and aren’t ready to get back on the horse yet.  Maybe we’re single because all the guys we’ve met are like this asshole.  Maybe we’re single because we just haven’t met the one that makes us want to be “coupled.”  Or maybe we just want to be single, you self-rightous, condescending, womanizing blow hard.  And you aren’t that hot either.  Needless to say, it’s a good thing I wasn’t on the date.  I’m sure Amy Jo handled herself much more maturely.  But I still think he deserves a drink in the face.

Now I have to share one picture, that when I opened it yesterday, it made me laugh out loud.  The picture is of my friend Shannon’s two boys, Adam and Jacob, in their halloween costumes.  It’s hard to explain why it cracks me up so much – I think just because I can imagine how serious they are.  Oh, and happy belated anniversary Shannon!  Remember when I was at your wedding and I did the alligator dance in my skirt?  Ahhh, those were the days. 🙂

A Few Things Worth Noting

I have several items to update everyone on, so I’m going to go ahead and make a list, that way I won’t forget anything.

Special Birthday

One of the highlights of my weekend was the opportunity to celebrate a very important birthday.  My goddaughter, Maren, turned 2!  Maren is Mandy and Grant’s little girl.  She’s been my #1 fan in all my running adventures this year, and our relationship has now progressed to the point where not only does she not cry instantly when she sees me, but she will run and give me a big hug and kiss!  (Okay, she does that to pretty much everybody, but it still makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.)  There were 6 kids present (including Maren) at her party, and I have to give a big shout out to all you moms because when you get that many kids together, add a big slice of sugary birthday cake, and some kazoos, that is a recipe for chaos!  I went over to Pete’s afterward, laid down on the couch, and he said I was asleep in like 2 seconds.  🙂  All jokes aside though, it was a lot of fun, and there is definitely a part of me that looks forward to a time in my life when I can throw b-day parties for my own little cuties (if I am so fortunate).  Here are some pictures for you to enjoy:

Now I might be a little biased, but is she not the cutest thing ever?!?!?!?

Running Update

Just a little tidbit on the post-marathon running.  In a moment of insanity, I agreed to go for a 10-mile run with Pete on Saturday morning.  We were both on a high from the marathon, and I think very surprised at how good our bodies were feeling by Thursday or Friday of last week.  Not wanting to lose any of the fitness we’d gained, we decided to test our legs in an easy 10-miler.  I woke up Saturday morning cursing my decision, but I plastered a smile on my face, slipped on my running tights, and headed to Pete’s where we agreed to meet.  At 8:00am we set off for our run, and I didn’t make it even half a block before I tripped on this metal thing (I can’t even begin to describe it) sticking up out of the sidewalk about 4 inches and twisted my ankle.  It hurt like a bitch, and my ankle started to swell up immediately.  So, I hobbled my pathetic butt back to Pete’s while he set off on the run.  He called me an hour an a half later saying his run was terrible, his body hurt the entire time, and it was definitely too soon after the marathon to be going for a long run.  Two things I learned:  1)  Nobody has any business running more than 2-3 miles just six days after the marathon.  Especially an amateur like me.  2)  The universe has a way of watching out for me.  I am very thankful for the minor injury right at the start of the run.  It probably saved me a lot more pain and heartache if I had made it the 10 miles (although my pride was a bit injured).

My closet business

Yesterday I closed on the sale of my custom closet business.  I started the business in the summer of 2005 so I had been working part time designing and selling custom closets for the past three or more years.  I was surprised to feel so sad after my warehouse was emptied of all the inventory yesterday.  As most of you know, business was pretty terrible the first half of 2008 which basically caused me to accept a new job, begin working full-time and finally, make the decision to sell.  So, when I found a buyer about a month ago, I was ecstatic.  But now that the deal is done, I’m definitely a little bummed.  Being self-employed has always been a dream of mine.  Now I feel like I had the opportunity, and I failed.  Not a great feeling.  Neither is the thought that I’ll be stuck working for “the man” for the next 30 years or more.  Sure it’s fine right now when I’m in a semi-new job and everything is unknown and fresh.  But if history is any predictor (and I hear it is), then in about 2 1/2 years, I will be bored out of my mind at my job and feeling like I am missing out on my life’s calling – whatever that is.  So, back to the drawing board on figuring out my dream career.  Hopefully, in some way that I have not yet determined, I’m getting closer.  I try to always remember one of my favorite quotes from Thomas Edison – “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”  It eases the sting a little.

Things I’m looking forward to this week

One of my favorite part of Lyndsay’s blog is when she posts her schedule for the week.  It always makes me feel close to her to know what she’s doing each day, even though she’s thousands of miles away.  So I thought I’d share some things I’m excited about this week.

Tonight I’m going to an Adult Ed workshop called De-Clutter Your Space with my friend, Muriel.  I actually don’t consider my space particularly cluttered as I’m not much of a saver.  But there are a few areas that definitely need improvement – my closets (ironic), my basement workbench area, and my home office.  So, I’m looking forward to some bonding time with Muriel while gaining some new organization skills.  I do love an organized space!

Tomorrow night I have my first coach’s meeting for the Valley Tiger Volleyball Club that I will be coaching this winter.  Although volleyball is one of the true loves in my life, I have never made the time to coach after college.  It seems like there has always been something more important to take up my spare time (getting married, getting divorced, grad school, starting a small busines – you get the idea.)  Anyway, I am REALLY looking forward to trying my hand in coaching.  It will be a lot of fun to share my passion for the game with those eager to learn.  And hopefully I don’t suck.

Thursday night I’m going to a party with Pete at his friend, Erin’s, house.  Okay, Erin is also his ex-girlfriend (as Pete would point out here, from a LONG time ago).  Still, I’m looking forward to getting to know Erin better which will hopefully help curb the minor pangs of jealousy I feel when she is regularly texting him and driving by his house (they live on the same street).  I will be making an extra concerted effort to be my most confident, friendly, witty and fun self.  I will also be making an extra concerted effort not to get embarrassingly drunk and emotional and overly-affectionate (which as we all know for me go hand in hand and are pretty much mortifying for my stoic boyfriend).  I also might need to get a new outfit.  If I don’t have time to squeeze in a shopping trip between now and then, I’m anticipating a Thursday night clothing crisis so, please, have your cellphones close by. 🙂

So that’s pretty much what I’m up to and what’s on my mind this week.  Oh, and one more thing.  Lyndsay made a new friend in Sweden who is a Life Coach, and a few days ago Lynds wrote on her blog some tips she learned from her life coach friend on ways to  live authentically.  I can’t stop thinking about what she wrote.  So here they are for further pondering:

Ways to Authenticity
1. Speak from my heart.
2. Listen from my heart.
3. Follow my urges.  (I agree with Lyndsay, this seems like it could be trouble!)
4. Acknowledge the parts of me that are not nice, kind, positive, etc.
5. Be uncomfortable.
6. Be nervous.
7. Be honest with myself and others (even when I don’t like the truth).
8. Say things aren’t okay when they aren’t.
9. Allow myself to need help.
10. Allow myself not to have all the right answers.
11. Allow myself to not be a ‘good’ girl.
12. Focus on not disappointing myself rather than not disappointing others.
13. Focus on pleasing myself rather than pleasing others.
14. Look at what is not okay in my relationships as a reflection of what is not okay in my relationship with myself.
15. Reveal myself, unfiltered.
16. Make a TO BE list, rather than a TO DO list.
17. Not have it all figured out and do it anway.
18. Have a staunch opinion (less diplomacy).
19. Do and say what I want – Resisting the need to always ‘look good’.
20. Take complete ownership of how my life is.

Marathon Photos

Here’s a link to my professional marathon pics.  It’s not a beauty contest, it’s a marathon!

http://www.marathonfoto.com/index.cfm?RaceOID=18922008F1&LastName=HANNAN&BibNumber=1508&Mailing=17782

And below are the pics that my mom took.  Notice all the moral support I had.  🙂

I Did It!

After four months of training, 330 miles of running, two pairs of running shoes, and countless hours spent whining and complaining to all of you, I am now officially a marathon finisher!  I finished in just under 5 hours and 15 minutes which by runner’s standards is definitely below average.  Luckily I am not using running standards but my own standards (which are much lower), and I’m just as happy as could be.  Hey, I crossed the finish line.  What more could I ask for?  During the course of 26.2 miles and over 5 hours, there are a lot highs and lows, as you can probably imagine.  Here are a few that stick out in my mind:

5 minutes before the race: I went to the kaibo for one last pre-race attempt to poop and….HALLELUAH!  HALLELUAH!  As any distance runner can attest, this is a very important part of the pre-race preparations.  And I was off to a great start!

First 2 miles: Running next to Pete in the sea of people.  There was so much excitement in the air and it was so inspirational to start off with everyone, I felt like I was flying rather than running.  I saw my friend Shannon who was cheering on her husband as well.  The first two miles went by in the blink of an eye.  I only hoped the rest of the race would go as well.

Mile 3.5: As I was climbing the long hill up Grand Avenue, I see a sign in the distance that says “What goes up, must come down” which happens to be my hill running mantra!  It’s my dear friends Mandy & Grant, my goddaughter Maren, and Jenny and Amy cheering and going nuts!  I’m so happy to see them, the half mile climb seems like an ant hill.  I will never forget the look on Maren’s face when she saw me, she looked like she was seeing Santa Claus with a sack full of presents just for her.  I can’t imagine what Mandy said to her to get her all jazzed up (probably something to the effect of when you see Kelly, you can have an Oreo), but it was so cute.

Miles 4-7: This is the beautiful area south of Grand Avenue.  It’s the hilly section of the course, but the hills didn’t bother me at all.  I was having too much fun talking to other runners, listening to the different roadside bands, and watching for my supporters.  My parents and Pete’s family were in this area.  I couldn’t believe how good I felt, this was a breeze!!

Miles 8 and 9: I see Mandy, Jenny, Amy and Co. again (twice).  They tell me that Pete is about a mile ahead.  I’m super excited that we’re both feeling so great.  I think, “This marathon thing isn’t so tough.”

Mile 11: I see Pete as he’s coming back from the Drake stadium.  We’re both smiling, feelin’ good.  His stride looks strong.  Hmmm…the arch in my left foot is starting to ache a little.  Oh well, don’t think about it.

Mile 12: I’m running around the track at Drake.  Wow, the spongey-ness of the track feels great on my knees.  I didn’t realize how sore they were getting.  Is it getting warmer outside?

Mile 13-15: I made it over the half way mark!  Holy crap, I’m only half way?  I’m starting to get tired.  The excitement is definitely wearing off, and my damn left foot is really being a bugger now.  I’d better slow down a little, conserve energy.  Pure joy when I see the girls and my parents again!  I have the best friends and family ever!

Mile 16: As I’m running down the hill, toward the Bill Riley trail, I can feel my IT band in my left knee tighten up.  Oh shit.  I still have 10 miles to go.  I decide to walk down the hill and get my headphones out.  It’s time to bring out the big guns.

Miles 17 & 18: The walking didn’t help my knee.  I do a combination of walking and running and stretching during this section trying to work out the ole IT band.  It doesn’t work, and it’s just getting worse.  I realize it is just going to be like this (painful and feeling like it’s going to give out) for the rest of the race.  I want to cry for the first time.  But I keep running.  Or at this point, it’s really more of a slow jog.

Mile 19: I’m in Water Works park.  I see Pete again, he’s looking a little worse for wear.  But he’s still running so I’m inspired.  And I see Alli, Jeremy and Jonathon!  My saviors!  Seeing them for a minute makes all the pain go away.  Temporarily.

Miles 20-22: The sun is beating down on me now.  Why didn’t I wear my g.d. running hat?  My left knee and my left foot are a nightmare.  I feel like I weigh 300 pounds and every step hurts.  I get passed by the 4:45 pacer and the 5:00 pacer.  What the hell?  No matter how much water and Gateorade I drink, my mouth feels like a cottonball.  I see my parents and my brother and Roupe, I try to put on a smile, but I’m feeling tears.

Miles 22-25: Why did I think I could do this?  This is an impossible endeavor.  People who run these things are crazy.  I wonder if I can flag down one of those golf carts to take me home?  I see the girls one last time before the finish line.  I give Mandy a look that says “I’m going to kill you when this is over.  It is your fault I am doing this.”  I wish I would have worn a shirt that says, “Are you f-ing shitting me?”  I meet another femaler marathoner who’s feeling as bad as I do.  We commiserate together and it helps a little.  We talk about how we will NEVER do this again.

Mile 25: I’m shocked I made it this far, but one more mile seems impossible.  My dear friend Scott finds me.  (He already ran the marathon in a blistering 3:28!)  He “runs” with me.  I cry.  I see Pete’s family again.  Lexie comes over and runs with me a little bit.  Lizzie comes and gives me a hug.  For the first time in the last hour and a half, I feel energized and think, “I can do this!”

Mile 26: I turn the corner on 3rd street, and Scott wasn’t lying, I CAN SEE THE FINISH LINE!  I cry again.  Mandy and Jenny are there to run with me.  I see my parents.  I see Pete’s mom.  With the tears and my extreme focus on the finish line, I miss seeing Pete, Aubrey and Nick.  But I can feel everyone’s support pushing me forward.

Mile 26.2: I finished!  Tears of joy.  I can barely walk.  Relief.

I spent the rest of the day celebrating with family and friends.  Pete finished in 4 hours and 28 minutes, a great time.  We were both ridiculously sore for a couple days, but the pain is subsiding now.  I am still having some issues with my left foot, but I’m sure its nothing plenty of rest won’t cure.  At this point I don’t have a burning desire to do another marathon, the pain is still too fresh…but I wouldn’t say never. 🙂

Meet the Parents #2 and the Marathon

Last night my bf, Pete, and I went to dinner and then to the Iowa Chops hockey game with my parents.  This seems like no big deal, right?  Well that would be correct except that this is really only the second time that Pete has hung out with my parents.  We’ve only been dating like 6 months you know.  Of course my parents (okay, my mom) are DYING to get to know Pete better.  Probably because it’s been like three years since I’ve had a serious boyfriend and lots of their friends are sporting beautiful new grandchildren…you can see where their minds are going with this.  (Let’s not put the cart before the horse, mom.)  So, anyway the night was kind of a big deal.  Well, those of you who know Pete know that he can be a little quiet (understatement of the year).  My dad, on the other hand, is the classic salesman.  He could talk to a mailbox and have an engaging conversation.  My mom and I fall somewhere in between.  Anyway, the long and the short of it is, I can’t think of one sentence that Pete said the ENTIRE time at dinner or at the hockey game.  I swear to God.  He did not open his mouth except to laugh at things my dad was saying (which was super cute btw.)  In his defense, between my dad and I, he probably couldn’t get a word in edgewise, but still…I was trying so hard to bring up topics that he could talk about…painting his house, his brother coming into town, the marathon (I’ll get to that in a bit)…and still nothing.  I’m not sure if he was nervous or preoccupied or just content listening (probably the last option), but if I hadn’t heard him talk in the car on the way to dinner, I probably would have thought he had laryngitis.  So I called my mom this morning to tell her thanks again for last night, and the first thing she commented on was how quiet Pete was, was he feeling okay, was he nervous, did he not like them, etc.  So, I had to reassure her that he did have a lot of fun, its just how Pete is, and it’s going to take a while for them to get to know him better.  So, we came up with a plan of attack for the next get together.  I am going to put duct tape over my mouth.  However long the silences get, I am going to do my damndest not to fill them.  And, my parents are going to use the divide and conquer method to try to get some one-on-one time with him.  Poor Pete, he doesn’t know what he’s in for.  My mom is determined to get to know him though, if it’s the last thing she does.  (I just realized that now I don’t want to give Pete my blog address.  What am I going to do about that?  Hmmm.)

I have one more funny (or maybe odd) thing to say about last night, just to give you a little more insight in to my relationship.  At 9:30 the game is over and we’re driving back toward my place.  Pete’s older brother just got into town from Denver at about the same time and was waiting at Pete’s.  So I’m thinking maybe we’ll go back to his place for a while and hang out, it will be fun to see Cam and hopefully his new baby, etc.  And while I’m getting excited thinking about this bonding time I’m going to have with Pete and his brother, Pete says “Well I’m pretty tired so do you just care if we call it a night?”  And drops me off at my house.  At 9:30pm on a Friday night.  I’m super caught off guard so of course I say ok.  Then he tells me that his brother is organizing a breakfast for Saturday morning with the family.  Nope, he didn’t ask me to come.  Sometimes, I feel like our relationship would be a case study for that book He’s Just Not That Into You.  (Okay, now I REALLY don’t want P. to read this.  Lots of people have secret blogs without their significant other’s knowledge, right?  I know, not healthy…)

Okay, so on to more important topics…the Des Moines Marathon!  Tomorrow, I will be running my first (and very likely my last) marathon.  I’ve run two basically half marathons last spring, and I’ve been training since the end of June for this race.  I am really freaking sick of running right now, and it’s very hard to believe the race is finally here.  The marathon course is 26.2 miles.  The farthest I’ve run is 19 miles.  (I tried to run 20 miles, but that turned into more of a run/walk because I had a stomach virus on the day of that run.  On that run, I stopped about 7 times to poop, 3 of them were in the woods.  It was awful.)  So, I’m still having a bit of a mental struggle with how I’m going to make the jump from 19 or 20 miles to 26.2 miles.  But that is how all the novice marathon training programs work.  Supposedly, I will have so much adrenaline from the excitement of race day, that it will easily carry me the last 6 miles.  Really?  Is that how that works?  According to one of my best friends, Mandy (who has run 5 marathons), the last 6 miles are going to royally suck, and I am pretty much going to want to die.  So, I’m expecting the worst and hoping for the best.  Did you know that several people died running the Chicago marathon last year?  That pleasant thought has been running through my mind all week.  Which is probably why I’ve felt sick to my stomach pretty much since Tuesday.  But tomorrow by 1 pm it will all be over (hopefully).  The one thing that will get me through is knowing that so many of you are going to be there, either physically or in spirit, to support me.  I will definitely be drawing on all that energy to get me to the finish line.  That and the thought of an icy cold beer.  Or a grape Smirnoff, that would be even better.  Mmmmm.

First post

So, I’ve been thinking about blogging for quite a while now.  There are a number of reasons I’ve been thinking about it, ranging from the practical to the slightly embarrassing to admit.  On the practical end, one of my best friends, Lyndsay, recently moved to Sweden and a daily blog is a great way to keep in touch in between our weekly phone chats.  (I LOVE reading Straight from Stockholm each day, Lynds!)  I also have a group of friends, the DCGs (dinner club girls) that meets monthly for dinner, and we’ve started sending out periodic email updates in between monthly meetings because otherwise our three hour dinner can feel like we’re reciting a checklist of what we’ve accomplished (or lack thereof) in the last 30 days.  As for the more embarrassing reason I’ve been considering blogging…for a long time I’ve been wanting to connect with women about our lives, our relationships, our insecurities, our strengths, our questions, our answers…you get the idea.  Researching and discussing these topics in my own analytical (the CPA, MBA, nose-in-a-book geek) yet emotional (Titanic movie loving, puppy dog kissing, no one cries alone in my presence) way is something I do daily and am very passionate about.  I’m finally ready to get my whirlwind of thoughts down in writing, and well, I’ll just start there I guess.  At the very least, it has to be cathartic, right?  Wink, wink, Pete.  You might be asking why I haven’t I started a blog yet if I’ve been thinking about it for so long and have all these great reasons?  I wish I had a rational excuse for my procrastination like “I’m just too busy to keep up a blog,” but with amount of Project Runway, The Hills and political talk shows I’ve been watching recently, that is so obviously not it.  It’s a somewhat pathetic excuse.  I feel very vulnerable in putting my honest thoughts ‘out there.’  And, I didn’t want to do a blog if I wasn’t ready to be REAL.  I don’t want a blog of small talk.  That is boring enough requirement of every day life, I certainly don’t want to write about it.  So, here I go, in good times and in bad, I’m pledging to tell it like it is, with my thoughts and feelings for all (three of you who will probably read this) to see.  At least, I feel that brave today.